A Thousand Wrongs to Make a Left

I’m the kind of person who cuddles to a pillow I’ve had had since birth [and now, I’m a little below 20]. I drink artificially flavored tea drinks like water and I have a lot going on in my head. Most of the time, the things that run through my head are the things other people wouldn’t really consider me thinking about. There are also times that I feel like other people are not real – like they’re just some sort of joke some scientist put into my world just for the sake of a stimuli response from me [their bona fide lab rat]. Sometimes, the sky makes me cry.

Small things comfort me. They remind me that I’m not so small after all. Big things do this for me as well. I’m a contradiction of the few things that define me and I guess I’m not different from everybody else. I’ve yet to see why I’m acting like I do now. I’ve yet to understand why I did the things few people would’ve done.

I have this dream of being somebody indispensable. Somebody who is a somebody to just one person and nothing more. All I have is my own to give and I only have one of those things. But I guess a puppy or a kitten has more chance of that happening to them than it happening to me.

Warm palms comfort me during rainy days. Doors make me want to yell out and kick them until their hinges are torn from the frame. Sometimes, I stop caring and slip away to some void where there’s something sweet to get my mind off things. I like drinking sweet things but not eating them, my jaws get tired.

And I have so many things to say if I only knew the right words to express them with. I’m an expressive person…in my head. I hug people…in my head. I treasure a lot of people and tell them about it…in my head. I practiced a thousand speeches in front of a thousand people…in my head. Yea, I have a hard time letting all of these things out of my head.

I have a lot more to say but I can’t find the words to express them with. If only I can show you people a screen where my thoughts are playing, things would be easier.

I’m a thousand wrong things that want to act right and I know, I’m not alone.

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About kyogakura
Bored 95% of the time.

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